Lately I’ve been hearing about a family friend whose son is not the best kid in the world. The kid has been taken to specialists, counselors, and even doctors to see if they could figure out the reason behind the bad behavior. As far as they can tell the boy is just disobedient and, basically, a jerk. Now the specialists are not the issue. I totally agree with trying to get the kid some help. Some things truly aren’t fixable by normal disciplinary actions. However, that being said, enabling the kid certainly isn’t helping.
The boy is a gamer. He does not take care of his stuff, and he spends most of his time either playing games or playing on the new bass guitar he got for Christmas. Why is he allowed to do that? Why not take those items away until he shows some improvement, and then give them back? If he messes up again take them away again. It’s a learned behavior, and he has obviously learned the wrong behavior. I have no doubt that at least one person in this boy’s life blames video games for how he is acting. But, honestly, do the games make him act like a total jerk? No. That is something that happened because of circumstances in his life.
He’s doing badly in school, but not because he doesn’t know the material. He just doesn’t do anything. He has over ten zeros for not turning in math homework, but every now and then he does actually do it and ends up with a 100. The boy is not stupid, he’s just allowed to continue in the bad behavior without any real consequences.
The moral of this story is simple: Parents need to find some way to discipline your kids. If no specialist, doctor, counselor, or anyone else can find anything wrong with your child perhaps the problem stems from you or the other parent. Do something about it. Do not let the child ruin his/her life purely because you did not want to be ‘hated’ for taking something away from them. In the long run your child will be better for the punishment you put onto them now. What's worse? Temporary discomfort, or permanent bad behavior? You decide.
